While the last seven months have been ridden with fear, guilt, discouragement and list of other things that make me the perfect candidate for depression, I knew I needed to find some simple tasks to focus on to help take my mind off the excruciating wait time.
I was basically on modified bedrest, due to the fact that I had to continually limit my activity to 30 minutes per task because of fatigue and because my body was reacting to the mild stress of standing for longer than that. That meant quitting my part-time job as a barista, and taking some vacay time away from macrame orders.
I will admit, at first I was bored out of my mind, and depression quickly set in. It was definitely a mixture of grief over losing Isaac, PPD, anxiety of this new pregnancy, and depression birthed out of isolation in being on some form of bed rest. There is really no use in pretending to be fine while buried under all of that, and I have conceded to being “overcome” as the band Live put it. I will say, it is less of me battling depression now, and more of learning how to live with it until I can seamlessly walk out of it.
In hindsight, there are many ways in which I keep my sanity while on modified bed rest, but I will save those for future posts. Today, I wanted to share how creating my own pregnancy journal helps me at least stay afloat for the remainder of this pregnancy as I walk through my depression.
With my last pregnancy journal, I found it to be hard to document my thoughts, my day to day discoveries and tasks, as well as keeping it all organized. I wanted a birds eye view of my daily and monthly habits like water intake, vitamin intake, symptoms. What was also hard about this journal was that when Isaac was born, I suddenly had all these empty pages that no longer related to my situation and when he died, it further magnified the incompletion of my pregnancy and journey toward motherhood.
I love the customizable feature of the Bullet Journal system. Yes, I had to lay everything out myself, but when you aren’t working and are on some form of activity restriction, this method helps the time blow by fast! I got to decide what I wanted in it, how I wanted to organize it, and the best part is that I set it up once a month. Which means that God-forbid this child decides to come early, I can easily change my future layouts to fit my current situation.
There are so many tutorials on how to set up a bullet journal on youtube, but very few if any on pregnancy, so it took me a while to collect my thoughts of what I wanted in my journal. but after a few days of looking at tutorials to familiarize myself with the basic setup and making a list of what i wanted to document, i was ready to go. below i will walk through sort of the bones of everything.
table of contents
this is here so i can easily search for my collections each time i open up my journal. every time i make a new page i document it here. no other explanation needed.
my calendar year starts from the month of conception and documents the next twelve months. here i put all of my future appointments or important dates i want to remember. i will eventually migrate these to my monthly and weekly lists, but this is a great space when i don't have anywhere to place this information yet.
i am breaking my journal into three sections, one for each trimester. within those sections i house my collections: categorized lists that i want to document throughout my pregnancy. this is where my thoughts stay organized as far as things for me to do, or important landmarks in my pregnancy. i come and add items to these areas rather than lists being speckled throughout my journal.
my monthly log houses several things which i have modified a few times throughout this pregnancy as i have found more efficient ways of logging. it contains my appointments and events for the month, a place for weekly medical notes, weekly log, habit trackers, and journal entries.
during the week, i log my activities whether pregnancy related or not, and at the end of the week i journal my thoughts about my pregnancy. i found i had a lot to say considering i am still sorting through all my grief, but i just needed one day where i process my emotions.
so that's the basic overview of my pregnancy bullet journal. like i said, there isn't much out there yet for pregnancy with this system in mind, so i hope it helps some crafty mama out there. If you would like to see how I set up my bujo on a monthly basis, let me know in the comment section below!
none of the items listed below were sponsored
lemome a5 dotted journal / amazon